I had a difficult childhood, experiencing both physical and emotional abuse. I also felt a sense of abandonment from the age of five when my mother died. I was troublesome at school so was sent away to live with my grandmother for six months after which the doctors agreed it would be best to return to my family. Although gifted in the sporting arena my lack of confidence severely restricted my ability to shine.
Finishing school and being free at the age of 18, I realised my father was a heavy drinker and watched him become a full blown alcoholic. I rebelled, got into drugs, alcohol and living a wild life with motorcycle clubs. I was getting in trouble with the law and now had a string of drug offences. At the age of 25 I split from QLD, as a wanted man, leaving everyone and everything behind.
I travelled Aussie for a while and found my way to Perth. I met my wife one Sunday at a pub in Jan 89 and married Dec 91. We had three boys who are totally awesome. After seven years depression started to attack me and after another seven years it had a total hold on me, I wasn’t aware I had depression at that stage.
My marriage fell apart in June 07 and I divorced Nov 08. I tried to move onto a new relationship prematurely and my soul was tortured further when she betrayed my trust, Jan 2010. After undergoing counselling (18 months) and not feeling any benefit from it I realised I had no one else to turn to so I decided to turn to God.
I mean who else can you turn to…right… when you’ve felt you have exhausted all avenues?
I started going to my local church and reading the bible and I was hungry for God’s word. The door opened when I heard about “Cursillo” where I met other Christian men. I began to realise that we don’t have to be anything or do anything to earn God’s love. We just need to be ourselves, be true to ourselves and be true with God.
While wanting to grow closer to God, I was still struggling with depression, and as I grew as a Christian I felt more and more uncomfortable in the environment I was working in… (The Casino.) Through my inability to concentrate on my job I finally got fired.
I was faced with the reality that I had lost my house, my investment property, my marriage… and now my job; I was shaking with fear, (let me tell you Centrelink are not very compassionate people).
I used my payout money to get a truck license and to pay the rent for two months. Those two months I soaked myself in God’s word. The Spirit led me to the “Living Water Spiritual Centre” in Joondalup. I stumbled across a book titled “Turning the Curse into a Blessing” (a study series on the book of Job) I learned all about suffering and suddenly it all started to make sense to me. In those two months my Lord nurtured me back to strength and everything started to change. Everything is still changing for me day by day and looking back to where I was 15 months ago, I can tell you Jesus really is real.
After running out of my medication (which was on a Friday, I couldn’t get to see my Doctor until Monday) I stopped my anti depressants immediately and my doctor, whom I had been seeing for a year was totally amazed ( by observing my posture and confidence) he knew, full well, it was all due to my Faith.
I am blown away by how far I’ve come in 2yrs and three months as a follower of Christ. My new job is awesome, all the emotional pain, trauma and depression have all withered away. Healing and the unshakeable confidence have taken over. Now, my own life experience, is used by the Lord to bring His healing power and hope to younger men, in prison and on the street, who have also had a rough deal in life. It’s all due to the power and authority we gain in our relationship with Jesus Christ, my Lord and Saviour.
We then realise conquering the world has nothing to do with money and power but everything to do with what you believe… know… and how you think.
“No, in all things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us” (Rom. 8:37)